Its been a while, and i feel, i'm ready to move on. When it first happened, i pretended everything was alright, went to work like nothing ever happened, Daph was amazed at how composed i was, cause for her, she'd channel her pain into self hurt. Me, i just suppress it, to the back of my mind, so that i won't have to think about it. Although i must admit, the first few days of putting up a front has been a very trying period, when i'm not preoccupied with things, i start to think of the what ifs and what could have beens, but then, i remembered someone saying, dont, cause it'll just cause more pain and heartache.

So days passed, i hated the fact of going home early, cause an idle mind is a devil's workshop (indeed it is), kept myself preoccupied, went out with friends, concentrated on school work (something which i've never done before!) and now, i wouldnt say i've totally let go, but i'm ready to. But all i need is closure, so that i can move on, start over again. Starting over as friends.

This trip was a spur of the moment kinda thing. but i guess, its a good thing, because then, i could leave everything behind, even if just for a few days, to clear up my mind, to forget and reflect on everything that has happened within the past year. From gaining back a friend and losing another. . Gaining a new addition in the family (and yet another to come by!! =D ) Starting school, and the toll its taken. For having you even if it were just mere months and the times spent. Mere 3 months into the year and so many things have happened.

I want to go there, leave this burden there, and come back, to a "new start".


M listening to a theme from twilight : river flows in you. apparently it's bella's lullaby?? but yea, anyone who has it, could you be oh so nice and send it to me =) its really soothing!

On a lighter note, i never knew kevin was a l4d addict!! ahaha..okok..maybe not addict, but well. Met up w ren n kev for dinner, headed to selegie for l4d. damn excites can!! saw karen's lil nephew's pic, gosh, he's so adorable!! bumped into dree, made me realise i havent been to church in eons, which is pretty bad, but blame it on shift work! heh.

interward transfer is in april, as much as i said i hated that sister (IT)and wouldnt mind transferring, i still secretly hoped i'd stay where i am till my bond's up, and so far, so good. heard that LQ is goin to 8d, pity her in a way cause the last time she got deployed there, she got bullied pretty bad. oh wells. now that PBL is no longer in our ward but AG, things have been very conflicting at work that, at 1 point, i shouted to YB...how the hell do they want us to work when they both are so conflicting?!?! that charles the dietician (i suspect he's gay) started laughing at me and said " dont stress, dont stress, later got wrinkles then not pretty le" -_-''
but at least, AG looks after our welfare as opposed to PBL who "worships" doctors and think they're always right! and at least AG has said things to boost my morale at work and i dont feel so demoralised now=D although, she has to stop repeating herself like a broken record, its getting to me!!