Don't be fooled by me.
Don't be fooled by the face I wear,
For I wear a mask, I wear a thousand masks.
Masks that I am afraid to take off.
But none of them are me.
But don't be fooled.
I give you the impression that I am secure,
That all is sunny and unruffled with me,
Within as well as without,
That confidence is my name and coolness my game,
And that I need no one,
Don't believe me, Please!

My surface may be smooth,
But my surface is my mask,
My vaying and ever concealing mask.
Beneath lies no smugness,
No complacence.
Beneath dwells the real me,
In confusion and fear,
In loneliness.

I idly chatter with you in the suave tones of surface talk.
I tell you everything that's really nothing,
Of what's crying within me.
So, when I'm going through my routine,
Please don't be fooled by what I'm saying.
Please listen carefully, and try to hear what I'm not saying,
And what I'd like to be able to say,
What for survival I need to say,
But what I can't say.

Only you can call me into aliveness,
Each time you're kind, and gentle, and encouraging,
Each time you try to understand because you really care,
My heart begins to grow wings.
Very small wings, very feeble wings, but wings.

With your sympathy and sensitivity,
And your power of understanding,
You can breathe life into me,
I want you to know that.
I want you to know how important you are to me,
How you can be a creator of the person that is me if you choose to.
Please choose to.
Do not pass me by.
It will not be easy for you.
My long conviction of worthlessness builds strong walls.
The nearer you approach me, the blinder I may strike back.
I fight against the very thing I cry out for,
But I am told that love is stronger than strong walls,
In this lies my hope.
My only hope.

Who am I, you may wonder.
I am someone you know very well,
I am a hurting member of your family,
I am the hurting person sitting beside you in this room,
I am every person you meet on the street.
Please don't believe my mask,
Please come behind it to glimpse the real me.
Please speak to me, share a little of yourself with me,
At least recognize me.
Please ...
Because You Care.

Author Unknown

its better to be asleep than awake,
cause thats where your mind wonders to another universe,
where you think of the what ifs and what could have beens,
where dreams are far more better than reality.
Cause when you wake up, reality's a bitch.

I cant help but wonder if what some people say is true,
that when you hit the big 21..
everything just goes downhill from there??

setback after setback,
there's only so much that one can stand,
i wonder when all these will end and that it'll be smooth sailing.

30 years from now,
Sitting on a rocking chair,
with 20000 cats purring at my feet,
throw in some knitting,
picture perfect

Works's a bitch..she's terminating people who can function well, but keeping people who cant even do simple things and have to ask a billion times about the same stuff,seriously now..how do you expect the ward to function properly if you have people like these?? and you..so what if you've been promoted to a P.A.N??? you dont even do your job..you're able bodied yet you want to get pregnant staff to do things..do you have any compassion at all???if you dont..why are you even a nurse for so damn long!?