sigh..its really really tiring....was talking to the person whom i can trust now...dex...i did wad u told me to...i looked back on wad u told me when i was pouring everything out to u...first i wana say thanks for taking a neutral stand...

u noe..i really did think abt wad u said...but i'm sorry to disappoint u...call me pessimistic ..bitch or wadeva u wana call me...i'm a loser kaes...i've decided to carry on with wad i had intially told u..i'm really sorry..i noe i shldnt run away..but its juz me...i'll juz take the initiative n leave...i mean...i've been outcasted by them back when we were in lower sec...coz of what? till date i have no idea..and the person who was "in charge"..non other then my neighbour..sum1 who has always been saying tt i'm her gd fren..but casting me out for reasons tt i know nthg of??..it hurts u noe...ya u may say she's gone thru it during the past year as well..the same treatment she recieved coming from me..yea..and i admit..i'm guity of it too...i never did say i was a saint or angel...

so now..seems to me tt it's wad she wants??(i wldnt noe)...its no difference to me anymore..u said its my fault for not letting each of them noe wad they were bitching abt each other...u said it was my fault for not defending either party when they bitched abt each other..i admit..at times i do bitch abt them to either of them..coz of their actions and all...but i guess its all to late to change the past eh...so i'll juz take the initiative n leave when i know i'm not needed whatsoever...i'll juz let them have back their happy little family...the same way it had been back then...

dex..again..i'm sorry if i disappointed u...but u've been a great fren...thanks
to venn n tt anonymous tagger...i know i shld trust in GOD...put him first priority...i did..i really did..i just need him to let me know of his purpose for putting me here..