argh...damn blogger..i juz typed a whole load of stuff..n it gaf me sum probs..and everything's lost..damnit damnit!!

had a talk wif sum1..lets name her B..she asked me this qns..: u miss her?

i'm sure every1 has seen da citygems advert..da one whr joanne rushes to fiona's side wen she was seen crying..tt part triggered sum memories...lets name this person A.. tt advert reminded me of the times when i was down..wen i cld juz pick up da fone..press da speed dial...n call her..w/o worries..n juz let my feelings out to her..whether it is to bitch abt..or to juz let out sum steam..she was always thr wif a listening ear..even if all i do is juz cry on the fone...she was there...i wonder how many sleeves of hers tt i've soaked wif my tears already!!..n i can rmb the times wen u were down..u called..n i rushed down to whr u were..to b thr to comfort u...

Then B asked me y is it tt A has done it 3 times to me...but yet i chose to remain frens wif her..i guess..i treasure frenship over anything else...esp one that has slightly over 10 yrs of history...but i dunno y..as much as i wish for things to go back the way it were..smthg juz seems to hold me back..i mean...the promised we made..u broke it..it was during retreat..da washing of feets.do u rmb wad u said..i did...it was a promise i thot i cld believe..it was made juz hrs..mayb mins away frm my burfdae...i was really happy..i thot we had sorted things out during retreat...but i guess i was wrong..coz barely few wks passed n then..u broke tt promise...

i was really hurt...n aft tt time..everything juz came crumbling down...everytime i face a prob...i dunno if i shld call u...in the end..i juz keep it to myself..n juz either cry myself to slp..or juz try ways n means to ignore it...u noe..wen my gran ma passed away...it juz seems like an auto response tt i dialed ur no...n i juz broke down...i dinnoe wad to do..i was intending to juz let u noe..but i juz broke..n u were thr to listen..do u noe how relieved i felt at tt time...i was soo close to my granma..its like i was back in old times..whr i can juz call u n let my tears juz run...i really wana go back to how things were...but i dunno y..thr's juz smthg holding me back...i’m not pissed…juz upset..n hurt..

saw glen in church juz now while studying...u're right glen..there's more to it...but i guess..it dosen really matter..mayb coz she's got sum1 else..i wldnt noe..coz i haven been out wif u guys since tt happened..i dun think my being thr will make any difference...so yup...

to those reading..sorry for this long..crappy..pathetic..sad n long entry...
oh by the way..it may sound a bit lesbian-ish..but NO!! we're not kaes..haha